My parents came to visit me for a month between February and March. While they were here I had the absolute honor and blessing to take them to the village I spent my first several months in, Makgato. I knew that sharing that piece of my life here in Africa would help to bind my life here with my parents back home. From the moment I arrived in Makgato, nearly a year ago now, I have wanted my parents to see where and how I'm living. The day finally arrived and after being removed from that village for 5 months now, I couldn't help but tearing up when I saw such friendly and familiar faces.The welcome I received from them was overwhelming and genuine. Beth came along for the day as well and between the extreme heat, dust and constant explaination of why things are how they look was exhausting. We left early in the morning and drove off into the northern part of Limpopo, aka, the middle of nowhere. It was incredible how normal it felt to me. We stopped at the high school where 80% of my time had been spent. The moment I laid eyes on Balton, my dear friend, I bolted. After missing him and so many others for so long now, I couldn't help but jump at the chance to hug him. The entire day brought on a lot of emotional upheaval, but to see my friends and my family again was amazing. To have the pleasur of introducing him to my mother and father was like a dream come true. They had been waiting for this moment as long as I had.
The school has changed. They built a huge security office, there are different teachers and new kids now. My favorite students all went off to study, or work on farms, or anything else they may be up to. The computer lab is finally up and running, with internet. We were able to visit several classrooms which consisted of a huge welcome, an insane amount of noise and dozens of photos taken by my dad. Everyone wondered where I'd been as most had never been informed of why I left. It gave me a chance to talk with some. I was surprised to hear that they felt I'd abandoned them. The fact that everyone was so happy to see me made this place even more special in my mind.
After spending plenty of time with the teachers and those who had made my life understandable while there, we went to the creche and the kids there sang songs and danced to welcome my family. We gave gifts and my parents got to cuddle up with all the little ones. I showed them the drop in center where the orphans go and went to the clinic. When I saw Joyce, my second hand, it was as if no time had passed. She was still as cheerful and positive as ever and did not leave my side for the rest of the day there. Once we got to the clinic, I got a call from my cousin Maggie. She said, "We're coming to fetch you!"
A donkey cart arrived and Maggie cried when she saw me. She couldn't even greet my parents until she had calmed down. I watched her face as my parents gave her a hug and I'll never forget that moment. Her shock and gratitude at their embrace, especially from my father was immeasurable. Having not had male role models around, and certainly not one to show affection, she was not quite sure how to respond. Afterwards, she whispered to me, "Is he always so nice?" I just laughed. She put us in the donkey cart and off we went into a world that is one I had not even experienced while living there.
I cannot accurately or appropriately describe the activites of the day other than to say it was amazing. What my cousins and my aunt did to honor me and my family is nothing anyone will ever live up to in my eyes again. All the smells, the dust, the bugs, pit latrines and noise seemed to fade when we pulled up and I saw my families. All the people I have had the pleasure of knowing came together in traditional outfits and gave my parents an anniversary celebration of their life. Tears made my mom a whole outfit, they were dressed in beads and taught dances. My father become one of them and starting singing and shouting with them. They learned how to drum, my father cooked porridge in a caldron over a fire and my mom even used the pit latrine with Beth.
Maggie and Tears constantly referred to my parents as their mom and dad and they decorated a part of their home as if my parents were of Sotho tradition and were coming home after being married. They were presented with food, cake, drink etc etc. All the gogo's of the village were there to sing and chant with them. They all got sloshed on traditional beer and who knows what else.
As the day went on, more people gathered, I saw some students after school there and my friends from the school also came to spend time with us. I saw less and less of my parents as they become totally absorbed in their celebration and became comfortable to communicate with them on their own. My father told me afterwards how several women came to him asking where I was, why I wasn't there and why I couldn't come back. Knowing that they were able to feel, even for one day, how I felt constantly in that place is enough to put my mind at ease.
It is not easy to describe Africa to people back home. In fact, I think it is nearly impossible. I can't describe what it feels like to live in a world that has stopped, been looked over and is so impoverished. My father said throughout the entire vacation we had across the country, the school in my village was by far the poorest he saw. None of that mattered because these people were my rock. The entire day was bittersweet. It reminded me of why I loved it there, it reminded me of my anger in being pulled from there. It made me sad to know they want me there and it reassured me that I should still be there. Peace corps felt I was endangered without ever consulting me and what I thought. I had to spend a fair amount of time reassuring my friends there that I did not intend on abandoning them.
It felt right to be cooking and sweeping and using the pit latrines. The cockroached didn't seem to bother me and even the heat felt right. Most other volunteers I've gotten close with who are also quite rural struggle in bonding with others. I feel so lucky to have experienced what I did. The day went too fast but at the end of my, my parents were awe struck, amazed and proud that I had impacted a community so much that those living there, five months later, planned such a day for us. I agree and I finally found closure and value in what I managed to do there in a rather short period of time.
It's great to know that my parents will take home a piece of Africa that most don't see in their lifetime. This is the Africa I will remember and this place will influence my way of living for the rest of my life.
